Pro soccer players might as well wear tutus. In fact, anyone that plays, watches, or even has a passing interest in soccer is most assuredly cockthirsty or at the very least a cross-dressing fairy.

I can prove it. Observe.



Sorry (lolz) if this offends my gay readers, but you guys (and girls I guess, but I think they're more into rugby which is also flaming) have zero street cred for a very good reason. Fucking SHOWTUNES. What the fuck is that all about. Seriously.